friend

4 Ways to Be There for a Grieving Friend

When many of us think of friendship we think of the good times.  After all, friendship is so much fun when there is laughter, joy, and lightheartedness!  However, perhaps even more important than the good times are the tough ones. Because a true friend is not just one who’s there when times are good, but also one who’s there to weather the storm.

One of the hardest things that a person can go through is loss.  Grieving is a delicate process that no one experiences exactly the same as someone else. It’s a unique and tough cycle that requires a lot of support. 

If you have a friend who’s grieving, you may not be sure how you can show them you care. As everyone’s love languages are different, you may find yourself struggling when it comes to showing the right gestures.  Fear not, if you have a friend who is grieving, here are some ways to help them through this difficult time.

Acts of Service

When you’re grieving, sometimes something as simple as getting up and getting dressed can seem monumentally difficult. Consider offering acts of service to your friend who is going through a tough time. Perhaps they need their home heated or they need to go grocery shopping. 

Making calls and doing their errands for them can lift some of the burden of day-to-day life from their shoulders and allow them to simply make it through the day. Practical help is always useful and alleviates stress.

Listen

Sometimes the simple act of simply listening without judgment can change someone’s day. Be present and simply listen. If they have nothing to say, just sit there. The mere presence of a friend can make them feel less lonely and less lost during a shocking moment like grief. 

Avoid offering advice, unless they ask for it, and simply let them vent. Validate everything they feel, and don’t argue with them if they’re feeling hopeless or negative. Simply listen, accept and avoid judgment of any kind.

Encourage Them to Seek Professional Help

As helpful as a friend can be throughout the grieving process, nothing compares to professional help when you’re going through grief.  Encourage your friend to consider that maybe a professional might be the best way to organize and sort through all of the different feelings they’re having. They’ll be able to give them the tools to heal that a non professional can’t offer in the same way.

Understand Everyone Has a Different Timeline

One of the most common conceptions that people have about grieving is that everyone should have a similar timeline for how long it takes to get over the loss of someone. However, some people take only a few days, while others can take years!

Accept your friend has their own unique timeline and allow them as long as they need to grieve without imposing any rules on them. Encourage them to take as much time as they need and go through their process as they see fit. Everyone grieves differently, and a friend who understands that is one of the best friends you can find in the world.