Home is Where the Heart Is: Navigating the First Move-In Together

Are you making the major life decision to buy a home and move in with your partner? Whether this is before marriage or after, it’s important to prepare ahead of time to ensure the transition goes as smoothly as possible. The short guide below can help with the process and ensure your first move-in is one filled with happiness and less stress!


Ask Questions and Have Deep (Sometimes Uncomfortable) Conversations


Open communication with your partner is crucial to making sure you’re both on the same page with how you will live. While there will always be a learning curve, these questions can help you get started with in-depth conversations to get to know each other’s living habits better:


  • How do you feel about having guests over?
  • Who will do chores around the house?
  • How will bills be paid?
  • How will grocery shopping be split? Who will do the shopping?
  • Who will cook?
  • Who will be on the lease?
  • Do we plan on getting pets?
  • What does your daily routine look like?
  • What does moving in mean for our relationship?


Living with someone for the first time can be a huge change, especially when it comes to sharing chores and bills. By openly communicating, both of you will know what to expect before you move in. Continue to ask questions throughout the move-in process to ensure you’re tackling potential issues before they become bigger problems.


Know When the Time is Right


While over 70% of couples move in after two years, that doesn’t have to be your timeline. If you feel the time is right and are confident that your relationship is strong enough to move forward, then moving in may be a great decision. However, if you have more doubts than confidence, you may want to revisit this decision and put it off for 6 months or longer. Take your time because this is a big life decision.


Set Boundaries That You’re Comfortable With


Boundaries in a relationship are important, especially when you live together. If you are not comfortable with paying more for bills or doing all the chores, it’s crucial to speak up. Make sure your partner understands what you’re comfortable with so both of you can respect boundaries.


Make Time For Yourself


Remember, just because you live together doesn’t mean you have to spend all of your time together! Counselors recommend prioritizing “me” time alone or with friends/family. Having your own hobbies and life means you’re keeping your independence while still maintaining a healthy relationship with your partner. Discuss what “me” time means with your partner so you can both understand what to expect.


Are You Ready to Move in?


The first move-in is one that can be filled with a lot of excitement for both of you! However, don’t let the rush of what’s to come cloud your judgement. Think about this decision seriously before moving forward, especially if it’s a large financial investment. Open communication is key and will ensure your relationship grows strong and respects boundaries from day one.